There is an old Buddhist short story on compassion and forgiveness that goes like this:
Somebody hit you with a stone and a Buddhist teacher says to you: “Who are you angry with?” You say: “I am angry with the person.” Buddhist Teacher says: “Well, it was the stone that hit you. Not the person. So why aren’t you angry with the stone. And you would say “I am not angry with the stone. Because the stone had no intention. It is just an inanimate object. The stone was thrown by the person. So I am angry with the person.” Then the Buddhist teacher says “Well, using that logic, you should not be angry with the person. You should be angry with the pain. Because the person is just like stone. Helplessly thrown by the pain.”
Thus, if we understand this way of thinking, it helps us to build understanding, compassion and forgiveness.
Always remember what Bill Bowen said
“Hurt People Hurt People.”
When we separate ourselves from people who are hurting – it doesn’t mean we are being judgemental. We should separate ourselves with compassion. “Compassion is a keen awareness of the suffering of another coupled with a desire to see it relieved.”
You get hurt mostly by your own inner pain and struggles. One should learn to not REACT – due to the belief that others are bad. Others are actually already feeling bad and think so – that is why they act the way they do. Moreover, people aren’t bad. They are just hurt and damaged. Thus, they badly need compassion.
Moreover, compassion is an extremely internal process. A journey into understanding the struggles faced by others and the pain they experience due to this. Compassion “is not trying to change or fix that person.”
“Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal truth.” – Lord Buddha
Do share and tell us if you have ever reacted without understanding the pain or struggle the other person is feeling. Do you find it difficult to forgive and let go? Contact us for an online course on Understanding Compassion and Forgiveness at www.wellnessworks.in
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Affirmations: Forgiving yourself to Heal Your Life