How to love unconditionally
When I was a kid I used to see these cute cartoons of a boy and a girl that was titled ‘love is’ – other than finding them cute they meant little to me. Now as I matured like fine wine. The four-letter word means a whole lot more to me that it never meant when I was in my hormone raging teens and later. I can’t say it’s been flawless and perfect but I can say I’ve lived, loved and learnt and so on Valentines I share my experiences of love.
Love is… myself
Commitment To me it is above all else myself, for if I don’t love and respect my body, I’m not loyal to myself I cannot be loving respecting and loyal to someone else. The more I pamper myself and learn to accept myself the more I have the strength to unconditionally love another soul. Like charity begins at home loving begins with yourself.
Love is… commitment
Like the Bollywood actor Salman Khan says, ‘once I make a commitment I don’t even listen to myself.’ A very deep thought behind this dialogue from the movies. To me, love is about making the effort a daily commitment to grow in it. To make the other soul feel special and cared for and loved and for that you the lover has to recognise the value of trust in a relationship and being faithful to your promises and true to your word.
Love is… acceptance
As partners many a time we do not see eye to eye after all if we would be completely like it would be boring. Loving each other gives you the ability to accept appreciate and respect the other soul for what he or she is for he or she as much as you would like it is not you. It is to me about having grace and being nonjudgmental, it is about actively fighting the temptation to be critical and judgmental toward the other. It is about growing larger than yourself and forgiving in spite of everything.
Many a time in the past I’ve been in love but did I really express it to the other soul, not really. The hustle and bustle the hectic dulls the shine of loving, beyond a point. We forget to hug, we forget to smile, many a time we forget eye contact. My mother used to say expressing your feelings is like watering a plant, without it, the plant will wither and die.
Love is… not fear
The best part is that you have five senses, so you can use them at different times to express yourself in a million ways. The more you communicate the more you understand the other, the less the misunderstanding.
Lastly, it is not important that the other person loves you or not it is more important that we are loving, that way we do not act out of fear. As humans, we like to control others. It boosts our ego that the other soul listens and obeys us. It feeds the ego but drains our soul, in the end leaving us empty.
It’s quite simple really, make every action of yours an action out of loving thoughts and feelings, and ask yourself am I acting out of love or fear. If it is fear and jealousy and our egos that dictate the action, change that. Not because you want to control the other, but because you just love the other soul.
Nothing makes life worth living as much as love does, so Love Just love.